9 posts tagged “music”

I have a few "before I die" goals. See the Aurora Borealis. Walk the Great Wall of China. Learn how to play a musical instrument.

The latter goal has been pursued in earnest since February. And, of course, the instrument of choice is the accordion.

The accordion makes me happy. I love the way it sounds. My favorite bands use the accordion: They Might Be Giants, Oingo Boingo, the Decemberists (and yes, "Weird Al" Yankovic). I guess some would say my obsession with TMBG prompted the accordion lessons, but I would argue that my love of the accordion prompted my obsession with TMBG.

I have never played an instrument. I took piano lessons when I was seven, sitting dutifully on that hard bench with my ancient piano teacher, Mrs. Little. Mrs. Little must have been 115 years old (though in reality she was probably about 60; everyone over 15 is "old" to a seven-year-old) and warbled when she kept time: "Onnneeeeee twoooooo threeeeee..."

Mrs. Little had no patience, which is an awesome trait for a music teacher. When she would get particularly frustrated with me, she would take my small hand and pound it on the keys, screeching, "NO! NO! NO!" And I, more humilated than hurt, would cry. If the sobbing would take place near the end of my lesson, Mrs. Little would bribe me with candy to shut up before my parents picked me up. The candy was circa 1953 "root beer barrels" kept in a sticky candy dish on her coffee table. I'm pretty sure I'm the only one that ever ate those things. I never told my parents about this until I was much older; I think I felt sorry for her.

I don't remember how long I took piano lessons, but do remember I just wouldn't practice. I would get by in my lessons, playing by ear, but Mom got peeved about spending good, sparse money just to fight with me over practicing. After my defection, Mrs. Little called occasionally, warbling her request to have me come back. And for years after that, whenever we'd see someone playing piano on TV or if one of my friends would play our usually silent upright, Mom would shake her head regrettably and say, "See, Keri? If only you would have practiced..."

And now, thirty years later, I realize she was right. Because if I had practiced piano, the accordion would be a helluva lot easier to learn. When I first called the accordion teacher he asked me, "What instruments do you play?" "None!" I said. "Never...?" he asked, incredulous, "How did you escape piano lessons?" I told him about Mrs. Little. "Huh. So... Do you read music?" "Nope!" I could hear him rolling his eyes through the phone. He knew he had his work cut out for him.

I was so excited for my first lesson. We started from square one. How to take it out of the case. How to put it on. Right hand goes here. Left there. That little button releases the air. These are called bellows. These are bass keys. That little rhinestone? Middle "C." Staff, G clef, treble clef, four count. Here's your music and assignment; you can borrow the accordion.

It's difficult. I mean, really difficult. Trying to get my left hand to do one thing while my right hand does another and reading music at the same time? Insane. But I keep at it. I practice at least 30 minutes a day, five days a week. Sometimes more. I think my teacher knows I'm serious about learning; I'm honest and earnest. I tell him when I haven't practiced. We spar. He tells me my playing sounds like I'm "leaving a trail of dead bodies," I tell him he's a freaking showoff.

I love it. This time I'm learning for me, and when it clicks and I play a piece straight through without mistakes, it's the most amazing feeling ever. I got my very own accordion from eBay; it's beautiful. There are many accordions like it, but this one is mine.

Bring on your accordion jokes (yes, I've seen the Far Side and the bumper sticker that instructs me to go to jail). I don't care. It's my instrument. It makes me happy. And I'm doing something I've always wanted to do.

Doesn't get much better than that.

What's the best music documentary or concert film you've seen?

This blog has been way too TMBG-heavy lately, but I think I'm required by law to post this. By law. Federal and state. Do you want me to break the law? I thought not.

By the way, the director of this film, AJ Schnack, has a new documentary called Kurt Cobain About a Son. Check it totally out.

OK Go gets it. There's nothing better than watching a rock and roll band blow shit up.

Have you been waiting for the ultimate Pixies tribute album?

Wait no more, my friends. It's here, with the likes of Prince, Elvis Presley, and Jimi Hendrix all paying their respects (which is odd, as the latter two are dead).

Here's something to whet your appetite. Wave of Mutilation by the Bee Gees.

Some would say my whole collection would qualify for "most embarrassing," but those people are not my friends and thus did not get Vox invites.

I'm going to have to go with the Titanic soundtrack. I told myself that I wanted it to play at work as background music and it was kind of nice, but the truth is I really liked it. I'm so, so very sorry.

"The Guitar," They Might Be Giants. Almost any song by They Might Be Giants will put me in a good mood, but this song puts me in the goodest of moods.

You're totally not going to believe this. It was "Weird Al" Yankovic. 1985 at the Greek Theater in Los Angeles. It was his "Stupid Tour," promoting the album "Dare to Be Stupid." I think I still have the t-shirt.

John Landis was at the concert in the audience, and I ran over to him after the show and said, "OH MY GOD YOU'RE JOHN LANDIS AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON IS MY FAVORITE MOVIE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD."

Flash forward to 1998. Again, "Weird Al" Yankovic. Again, Greek Theater. Again, John Landis is in the audience.

I totally chickened out. Dammit.

Does "Weird Al" count as a rock concert? It kind of counts. Have you seen him rock that accordion? Dude is HARD CORE.

This is what happens when one is stuck in a U-Haul for hours and hours.

UPDATE: Please try the link now... It was broken. Doh, indeed.

You know, I don't really succumb to peer pressure all that often. Oh, sure, there was that time in high school where I performed an interpretive dance of "Little Bunny Foo-Foo" because my audience demanded it. Wait. That was last week. Regardless. I am not one to falter my convictions just because my name is being chanted and a pair of bunny ears are placed upon my head.

But when I noticed that both Harold AND Jamie had "Clap Your Hands and Say Yeah" on their lists, what was I to do? Succumb, I tell you, SUCCUMB!

I'm totally digging it. Has that David Byrne vibe to it that I like. Plus, the album cover looks great on this page.

Now, if they could record a version of "Little Bunny Foo-Foo," that would be awesome.