Clamhead

QotD: Stolen Goods

nobody@vox.com(clamhead) — Sun, 23 Mar 2008 13:51:13 -0700

What's the most valuable thing you've ever had stolen?

Oh, Vox. It's like you follow me on Twitter or something.

This question is especially timely considering I spent part of last evening in front of a bar in the Mission dressed as Madonna (Borderline/Lucky Star) examining each and every bag that came out of the door.

My bag went missing last night (well, technically, this morning) and with it my wallet, phone, and a friend's wallet and phone I was carrying. And we were there. We were Standing! Right! There! Right next to the bench with all of the coats - piled on top of the bag - and still it was swiped.

I've never had my bag stolen before. And you know, there's this optimism - it will turn up, SURELY it will turn up - which is rapidly replaced with a horrifying, sinking feeling when you realize that, no... no, it's gone. Then your mind races, taking inventory of the bag's contents. MY IPHONE! SHIT! MY WALLET! SHITSHIT! REBECCA'S PHONE AND WALLET! SHITSHITSHIT! Then you break it down further, and take stock of what was in the wallet. MY DISNEYLAND PASS! OH DEAR GOD NOOOOOOOOOO!

What a helpless feeling. No money, no cards, no phone to call somebody who might have money, phone, or cards (but this was handled nicely by Rebecca who grabbed a random person and said, "Can I use your phone?"). But still, still, you hold out hope that it was somehow a case of mistaken bag identity and the person who accidentally took it will be a good, decent human being and return it, untouched.

This was debunked when our cards were used to buy gas in the wee hours of the morn.

This is the point you realize that your bag and stuff is gone, all gone... And you now have permission to start calling people "fuckers."

But then you count your blessings. I, for instance, debated whether or not to carry my Nikon D50 around last night, and decided against it (based on some sound advice I received). My ID still has my Southern California address on it, so I don't necessarily need to change the locks (though I probably will anyway). My iPhone had been synced recently. I didn't have a ton of cash in my wallet. It wasn't a particularly expensive bag (though well-worn and well-loved; dubbed "The Woobie" by Paul because I carry it around so much). So yes, it could have been a lot worse.

But it could have been a lot better if some people didn't suck and weren't, indeed, how shall we say, fuckers.

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QotD: Sticks and Stones

nobody@vox.com(clamhead) — Tue, 26 Feb 2008 07:06:09 -0800

What's the meanest thing you've ever said to someone?

"I do."

Ba-da-bum.

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QotD: Holiday Cards

nobody@vox.com(clamhead) — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 11:36:23 -0800

Were your holiday cards store bought, handmade, online, TBD or MIA?

I illustrated my cards this year and ordered cards from Moo. They took longer than I expected to get here, and are now sitting on my dining room table waiting to be sent (they look good, though). I may or may not get to it this year. Luckily, I didn't put a date on them, so I can send them next year if need be.

Here's the illustration. No, it's not meant to be me. I guess I just draw chicks who look like me.

Joy

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QotD: This One Goes To 11

nobody@vox.com(clamhead) — Wed, 24 Oct 2007 09:16:15 -0700

What's the best music documentary or concert film you've seen?

This blog has been way too TMBG-heavy lately, but I think I'm required by law to post this. By law. Federal and state. Do you want me to break the law? I thought not.

By the way, the director of this film, AJ Schnack, has a new documentary called Kurt Cobain About a Son. Check it totally out.

Gigantic (A Tale of Two Johns) - A movie about They Might Be Giants

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QotD: Best Buy

nobody@vox.com(clamhead) — Sat, 22 Sep 2007 20:44:40 -0700

What's the best thing you ever bought off of Ebay or Craigslist?

<curmudgeon>It's spelled "eBay" with the CamelCase.</curmudgeon>

The best thing I ever got off of eBay was a sign from Disneyland. It used to hang over the Mad Hatter shop in Fantasyland, but eventually became too weathered for Disney standards and was put up on eBay by a guy who insisted he obtained it by completely legal means. Later, I came to doubt this.

It was expensive - over $200 - but I had to have it. It was, after all, a Disneyland "artifact" (a prop or other item that has been used in the park), and it had an Alice in Wonderland theme. This was also my first purchase ever on eBay (this was back in 1999), so I was a little wary. Still, I braved it, bid, and won.

Then the trouble started. I was told it shipped. Two weeks later, nothing. I sent numerous emails. He would respond, but always with the same info, "It shipped," but wouldn't give me a tracking number. I became increasingly nervous. I sent more strongly worded emails. My contact would blame his "partner," whom I doubted existed.

When I finally threatened to get eBay involved, I got an email explaining they were confused, it was a different item that had shipped, and my item had indeed been shipped by FedEx. My request for a tracking number was ignored.

It finally showed up on my doorstep hastily "packaged" in a collapsed brown box, the open ends loosely taped shut. There was no waybill or any indication it had been shipped at all. My suspicions were confirmed when I checked the location of the sellers - they were one city over from me. Clearly, they shoved it in a box, drove it over, and dropped it on my front porch - and pocketed the money I had given them for shipping and insurance.

I could have pressed it, but I didn't. I was so relieved I hadn't lost my $200, I let it go, but not without sending them an email explaining I knew what they did. And that Mad Hatter sign is still one of my favorite things ever.

You'd think that experience would put me off, but no; I've used eBay quite a bit since then and haven't had a single transaction that's gone bad. Everyone should use eBay for all their ecommerce needs. Shop victoriously.

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QotD: I'm A Completist

nobody@vox.com(clamhead) — Wed, 29 Aug 2007 09:18:43 -0700

Do you own all the albums of any particular musical artist or group? Who?
Submitted by dutterman.

I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about.

[whistling nonchalantly]

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QotD: Stop Me If You've Heard This One

nobody@vox.com(clamhead) — Mon, 26 Mar 2007 11:00:59 -0700

What's the infamous story people tell about you?
Submitted by Cherney.

I was so freaking cute as a child. SO CUTE. Very precocious. Of course, "precocious child" translates to "obnoxious adult." Ah well.

I was about two years old and playing outside. I seemed to have had a ephiphany, and I ran inside to tell my parents. I gathered them, very seriously, and said (in my toddler Baba Wawa voice), "I know evwything der is to know about mouses. Firwst, der's a Mickey Mouse. Den, der's a Minnie Mouse. And dat's all der is to know about mouses." And then ran back outside.

But I was right, dammit. That is all there is to know about mouses.

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QotD: First Signs O' Spring

nobody@vox.com(clamhead) — Wed, 21 Mar 2007 09:58:02 -0700

What, to you, is the first sign of spring? Have you seen it yet?
Submitted by Spy.

This is the Japanese maple I bought back in September. When I bought it, it had leaves, but the nice person at the nursery reminded me it would be losing its leaves soon. Good thing, because when it dropped all its leaves a few weeks later, I would have thought I killed it and tossed the thing.

For the last few months it's basically been a stick in a pot (step 1! Cut a hole in a pot! Step 2! Put a stick in that pot!) and I have been wondering if it's been dead all along. I mean, how would I know?

Just yesterday I noticed little leaves busting out that weren't there two days before. So, HA, naysayers (Jeannie)! I DIDN'T KILL IT! So don't say "nay" anymore!

Japanese Maple

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QotD: Totally Obsessed

nobody@vox.com(clamhead) — Fri, 02 Mar 2007 09:15:26 -0800

What is your current obsession(s)?
Submitted by eijsr.

It's a good thing I'm not obsessed with anything, otherwise I'd be really annoying.

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QotD: First Celebrity Crush

nobody@vox.com(clamhead) — Mon, 26 Feb 2007 13:15:02 -0800

Who was your first celebrity crush?
Submitted by Glory.

I think the first one I can remember was David Naughton from An American Werewolf in London (and also the "Be a Pepper" commercials), but that didn't last too long. I think the most significant crush I had growing up was on... and I think I've admitted this before... Rick Moranis. Yes, you heard me right. Cute as hell and funny to boot (or "aboot"). I watched SCTV every Friday night waiting for Bob & Doug, Merv Griffin, Jerry Todd, or any of his other characters to show up. I thought he was freaking adorable. Still do, actually.

With that in mind, you know this scene from Parenthood just made me swoon:

"Close to You"

Oh, and this too:

Little Shop of Horrors - Suddenly Seymour

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